This thought would have come to every body's mind at some stage or the other in life. There are times when we simply sit back and wonder, are there bounds to our thoughts ? The so called "self imposed restrictions" on ourselves which make us feel rather "disciplined" and in full controls of our lives ?
I fall into the category of a typical Indian girl, brought up in Chennai, in a brahmin majority school n society. As a part of my upbringing, developed and imposed on myself some of those "rules", which defined the do's n dont's of my life. I very unassumingly followed these rules until a few days back, when I had a long conversation with my cousin who was about to set out on her tryst with college life. And as an elder sister, I tried passing on some of those values, but along the conversation arose the urge to reconsider the 'rules'. To probably sit back and analyze as to what made me make the rules and what IF I break them. Why at all pass on the tradition without a version control ???
I fall into the category of a typical Indian girl, brought up in Chennai, in a brahmin majority school n society. As a part of my upbringing, developed and imposed on myself some of those "rules", which defined the do's n dont's of my life. I very unassumingly followed these rules until a few days back, when I had a long conversation with my cousin who was about to set out on her tryst with college life. And as an elder sister, I tried passing on some of those values, but along the conversation arose the urge to reconsider the 'rules'. To probably sit back and analyze as to what made me make the rules and what IF I break them. Why at all pass on the tradition without a version control ???
Some of those things I told her
>> Ensure that you have a good girls gang, a set of girls who would always help you draw that fine line of difference between the "right and wrong" when your young mind sometimes forgets how to think sane.
>> "Maturity" is a very subjective word, and its definition and scope differs from person to person, always remember, when the world around you does not understand your thoughts, its not that you are wrong, it is just that they need more time.
>> Make loads of friends, but girl, remeber, until 21, its too early to commit. There would be many such occasions when you would just wonder, whats wrong if I say "I do"...But Halt....If you are sure your relation can stand the test of time, hold on till 21, and if the guy cares, he would respect your decision.
>> A late night movie, post 7 PM beach, late night bike ride, with a guy, unless its quite warranted, should be avoided, unless you know the guy really well. (But the loophole is, this level of trust is completely left to your discretion.)
>> Drinking n smoking are no crime. But when it comes to choosing you intimate friends, ensure that you can trust them at all times of the day, or be aware as to when you can and when you can't.
>> There's a fine line of difference between being 'assertive' and being 'arrogant'...Learn to play your cards right with the right people and, this is a skills that can only be mastered with time.
And many more........
But as I told her all this, all of a sudden I realized, some of them were not really necessary, I'm sure most of you would say, which generation are you talking about girl ? Probably now I agree. In fact, at the end of this conversation, I told my young sis as to how I had broken most of these rules and when and why ...!!! I somehow felt she should know.
None of these were imposed, nobody asked me to draw boundaries, infact, unlike most moms, my mom never gives me a lecture on the do's n dont's....She simply says, "take care, and always, ensure that you are in a position to answer to your conscience"!!!
But as I told her all this, all of a sudden I realized, some of them were not really necessary, I'm sure most of you would say, which generation are you talking about girl ? Probably now I agree. In fact, at the end of this conversation, I told my young sis as to how I had broken most of these rules and when and why ...!!! I somehow felt she should know.
None of these were imposed, nobody asked me to draw boundaries, infact, unlike most moms, my mom never gives me a lecture on the do's n dont's....She simply says, "take care, and always, ensure that you are in a position to answer to your conscience"!!!
People who know me today, wouldn't exactly brand me conservative, I've changed, transformed, but yeah, each change was initiated by my surroundings, from a petite young girl, who always adhered to the rules, to a girl, who has learnt to sway with the tide. The journey was great n exciting....
But yeah...Finally I did tell her one thing, when you learn to sway with the tide, you better learn how to avoid the risky highs, a small mistake..n its just seconds before you drown, and if you take care, its the most adventurous ride....Called youth !!!!
